On nursing and calculus

Audrey and I made another visit to lactation to make sure that all was well.

And...all is well.

I've learned that maybe I can chill out and relax.  Nursing is actually going well this time around!!!  We got off to a slow start, but Audrey's up to 8lbs 8oz.  That's great considering she was 7lbs 1oz just three weeks ago.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I also need to learn to ask questions and accept help.  Each time I call lactation to ask a question the tiny voice in my head says "It's not that big of a deal.  You don't need to ask."  And then I think -- why not call?  If I have a question, it's totally okay to ask.  That's why they are there.

Nursing doesn't seem to come naturally to me.  Don't know why, it just doesn't.  I feel like it's harder and more work than it should be.  But at almost seven weeks out, it's getting much easier.  Audrey is eating less frequently and eating faster.  Things are going well -- so well, in fact, that I'm doubting myself.

Here's where calculus comes in to the picture. At the beginning, when I was frustrated with breastfeeding, I'd think things like -- "I got an A in multi-variable calculus, for goodness sakes, shouldn't something as simple as breastfeeding come naturally? I can do this."

'Cause, you know, breastfeeding and calculus totally require the same skill set.

Resorting to violence during finals week.

This week I actually was thinking about calculus and how I managed to make it through all those brutal math classes in college.  It dawned on me: I had lots of help.  I did every assignment with Allison and Ben.  We spent many afternoons and nights together in Wright Hall or our dorm rooms in Noehren.  Three brains proved better than one when it came to me and calculus.  That and we studied from past exams...can I admit that now?...oh well, I just did.  Everyone else did, too, so that makes it totally okay.  Right?  Anyway, back to my post...we also asked lots of questions.  Lots of visits to see sarah-marie (our professor with teal hair who didn't capitalize her name).  Granted she was our linear algebra prof, but she taught me that not everything comes easy.   She taught me that sometimes I have to work at things.  I remember being especially frustrated in her office one day because I couldn't figure out a math problem.  And she wouldn't tell me the answer!!!  (Gasp!) My professor wouldn't tell me the answer, she made me work at it until I figured it out myself.  Seriously.  The nerve.

I did a lot of calculus homework in those green velour pants.

So, (here's where I seamlessly tie the two together...or not so seamlessly) Audrey and I headed back to lactation today and we figured it out together with Connie the lactation consultant.  I've seen Connie a few times now.  I asked questions. She had some good answers, but she also said it just becomes more automatic with time.

Sometimes I just need the reassurance.  Ya know?

And, on a side note, if Allison Brcka happens to read this blog...get on Facebook already!!!